All things happen for a reason

Last Wednesday was transfer day and we were all So very excited. All of the test results and updates leading up to the day were great! My husband and I were stuck in traffic making mental calculations about whether we would make it to the fertility center on time when I received a call.

“Hi Sarah, I’m sure you are on your way which is why I wanted to call to tell you
to turn around. We don’t have anything to transfer today.”

Oh no… My heart sank.

I asked a few questions but the nurse couldn’t fill me in on any details because she had yet to reach the parents but had called me because she didn’t want me to waste a trip down. The nurse asked that I not relay any details to the parents as she needed to speak with them directly first. Unfortunately, Amy was teaching and had her phone on silent. After a little bit I relayed to Amy and Al that the nurse was trying to reach them. It was killing me to know this sad news and they were both still blissfully ignorant and basking in the excitement of transfer day. That was the hardest part of the day for me. I was sad for them and this sudden change of events. I cried knowing what a disappointment this would be and how difficult that call must be to hear. It may have been a little bit easier to process and accept if there had been some subpar stats leading up to transfer, possibly. But it was a hard day for all four of us.

The rest of the day passed in a foggy blur. I had planned to take the day and next couple of days on the easy side which meant I had cleared my calendar. It also meant very little in the way of distractions. I don’t think any of us slept very well that night. After a couple of days we started to pull ourselves back up and point our gaze onward.

What’s next? What do we do now?

On Wednesday I stopped estrogen and progesterone immediately. The next day I began provera to encourage my next cycle to start (should be in the next week). In the meantime, Amy and Al have been busy trying to line things up to get a realistic timeline for the next possible transfer. We are hopeful that it will be the end of this coming cycle. Stay tuned.

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